Tuesday, October 5, 2010
The Story Goes Like This
After accepting my referral the next step was to wait for the Nepalese Govt. to issue a Travel Approval known as a TA in the international adoption world. I got my TA on July 27th, but did not hear that I received it until August 5th. The next day, Aug. 6th, the US Govt. announced they were suspending adoptions in Nepal. The next thing they told us was they would still honor the 80 families who had been matched with children, and we were now in what they call "The Pipeline".
We were told NOT to travel to Nepal and were to wait for the US Govt. to tell us what was to happen next. Nothing came until August 26th when they announced that we could file our I600 petition from the USA. The I600 petition starts the 'investigation' process of the adoption to determine whether or not the child is truly an orphan. Prior to Aug. 6th, you had to travel to Nepal within the 60 days given from the date on your TA, and file from Nepal. The investigation phase then took 2-3 weeks and you could go home with your child. We were told we would be held to the same investigation standards, so we thought we had nothing to worry about.
I filed immediately as it was a first come, first serve basis. Since the US Embassy was giving priority to families who had received their TA, I figured I was near the front of the line. As of my meeting Oct. 1, with the Embassy, I was told my investigation would possibly be starting next week.
We were also told the the Nepalese Government was giving verbal extensions to those families who's TA's were expiring. In my case, two months from July 27th was Sept. 27th. If I let my TA expire, and it turns out the verbal extension was not happening, I could risk losing my child, and then this would all be over. I waited and trusted the system.
Over the next month I waded through the mire of incomplete information, trying to understand what to do, who to believe and how to act. It seemed the most effective thing to do was to contact our Representatives and Senators and push for a speedy investigation and resolution from Washington D.C. Meanwhile the families who were being investigated were not being approved but instead sent to the US Embassy in New Delhi for further investigating. This means it is now a problem for Homeland Security, USCIS. So much for being held to the same standards of prior to Aug 6th. Not only were cases not being approved, but the investigations were taking 5-9 weeks or longer.
Meanwhile, back in the States, it became clear that the verbal extension for TA's from the Nepali Ministry wasn't holding much water and once the State Dept issued a letter saying as much, I was on a plane within 5 days. I arrived 3 days before my expiration and was granted a small extension because I had arrived within the time limit. It appears that an extension may or may not be granted on a case by case basis. I was SO THANKFUL I came.
On the ground in Kathmandu it was so obvious that these children needed homes and that this whole mess was a real shame. Nepal is one of the 10 poorest countries in the world and these kids don't have any kind of future. Without a family or an education there is no hope for them to do much of anything with their lives except pick up trash or worse, be sold into prostitution across borders. It's sad and bleak and would break your heart of you were here. The poverty is shocking, and I've seen a lot.
I visited the orphanage every day, and each day began bonding more and more with Pukar. They had been telling him his mommy would be coming to pick him up someday and we would fly home together on an airplane. I started to realize that it would be really hard on him, and on our bonding and attachment, if I were to suddenly leave after being here every day. There was no way for him to comprehend the complexity of why his mommy would come and then not come again for months. I also didn't think I could go home and leave him here. I was too in love. After about a week, I made the decision to stay here and wait out this whole process.
It doesn't make sense anywhere but in my heart. It's not financially feasible, it is hard on my business partner, on my boyfriend and his kids, and on me. Living in Nepal is no picnic, especially with a child. This blog is a way to be able to stay here with Pukar.
Please don't feel obligated, but if you are touched in any way by my plight, and wish to help, simply click the donate button and offer anything. I am extremely grateful for any and all help I receive. I hope this will all be over within about 3 months and I will be able to return home with my beautiful boy and introduce each and every one of you to an amazing, very brave and special little soul named Pukar Makani Lund. Makani is Hawaiian for Wind, thus, Prayer on the Wind. He will touch your heart I'm sure.
To view an amazing slideshow of Pukar and Nepal made by my dear friend Joy click on: Nepal: Never End Peace And Love
or see my own slideshow in: Boudha to Pashputinath